. I haven’t really been wearing my armor of salvation lately, nor have I really been living for Him. I miss the fire and the passion I used to have. I am so wrapped up in the worldly things. I am being torn in so many directions. I know I am strong enough to handle this, but I don’t want to. This is my prayer that God you would handle this instead. I miss you more than I can stand to even think about. I miss our nightly talks about my day or what is going on in my life. I miss you guiding me through life. I am so tired of depending on myself and what I think I should be doing. It is obviously not working I am totally screwing it up. I know this summer I will really be able to reconnect and get back, this is the excuse I am using for everything. I will get my fit body back this summer, my eating habits, and my relationship with Christ. NO! It doesn’t work that way!!!! I can no longer be complacent and let the devil have this hold on me! This is not who I am! I am His daughter made in His perfect image! Right now I am not portraying Christ, I am definitely not pure. Please forgive me, I am so sorry Dad! This is not okay; I know you want what is best for me that is why you gave me a road map to life. The very something I have not been using.